“You only get one shot, do not miss your chance..”Lose Yourself, Eminem
It’s so strange to quote a line from a rap song when you’re thinking about your funeral but here we are. You truly get only one shot at getting your own or someone else’s funeral right; there are no do-overs, literally.
When it comes to sending someone off, remember this; your loved ones want to do things right by you (a difficult task if you haven’t spoken to them about your wishes) and give you the departure you want, to the best of their abilities. It’s not just the materialistic aspects of a send-off like the scale of your funeral or how grand your casket should be. It can be the tiny things too, for example, who should they invite or heck the type of music to play.
Take me as an example, music is a very big part of my life and I want that to be reflected at my own funeral. I once heard of how the ancient Nordic people would sit by the bedsides of their dying loved ones and sing to them as they slowly depart this world. I love this idea! However, I don’t think that my family will share the same level of enthusiasm. So to make things easier for them, I’ve prepared a Spotify playlist for them to play at my funeral.
And that’s only one of the many examples of the things you may want to consider or put your own twist to when it comes to planning for your own funeral. So let’s talk a bit more about the other things that you may not have thought about but are equally important, along with how you can use Bereev to make your wishes crystal clear.
What to do with your body?
First things first, how should your family deal with your body? It can be simpler for some if their religious beliefs advocate for a specific way of internment. For example, Muslims are always buried so there’s not much of a decision to be made. However, if that’s not the case then you’re going to have to help your family with that difficult decision. Are you a fan of burial, cremation or do you want to donate your body to science?
How about religious preference?
There’s no denying that death and religion can be very intertwined in many cultures. If this is something that matters to you, the best way to ensure you’re getting the send-off you want is to make that decision now and lay that out for your family. This can be very crucial especially for folks who have converted to a different religion from their family.
Which photo should they use?
Sounds so minute but I’ll speak for myself, the last thing I want is for my family to use a 10-year-old photo from my passport (which I hate) as my memorial photo, no thank you! So what’s the best way to avoid that? Pick your favourite photo now (while you still can) and share that with your family, tell them this is the photo that you prefer to be used on your tombstone or during your funeral service.
Who’s on the guest list?
Before my grandfather passed, he created a list of names (distant relatives, childhood friends and ex-colleagues) along with their contact details. His instructions were simple; when I’m gone, make sure to inform the people on this list and invite them to my funeral. This simple act provided much relief to his children, that’s one less thing to worry about.
What music should they play?
As a fan of instrumental music and musicals; I’d be damned if they started playing pop or country music at my funeral. But I don’t have to worry about that, not ever since I created my own funeral playlist. All I have to do is just share that with my family so they can get this part right. We’re currently working on a feature where you can add your Spotify playlist on Bereev.
What do you want to wear?
One of the most profound memories I have of my grandmother’s funeral is the clothes they dressed her in for her viewing. I remember staring at her in the casket, thinking is that really her? I barely recognised her. After all, that’s not how she was usually dressed in the 20 years I’ve known her. I don’t know about you but I want to be in the clothes I’ve worn all my life.
What should your tombstone say?
Whether you’re planning to have your favourite scripture carved onto your tombstone or decide to swing to the other end of the spectrum by making it your one last joke. It’s best to write it down and hand it over to whoever who’ll most likely be handling your funeral. Or better yet, specify that on your death plan @ Bereev.
Bereev is a Death Preparation App that helps you prepare yourself and your loved ones for your own death. Sign up for your FREE account here.
Leave instructions for your funeral, financial and personal arrangements.
Store vital documents like your will, insurance, medical records and more.
Leave messages for your loved ones which will be sent after you’re gone.
Invite the people you trust to view your plan and customise their access.
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